1. Open mouth
2. Stuff food in mouth
3. Chew. Preferably with mouth closed.
4. Swallow.
Repeat until sate (or no more food available)

See? Life ain’t that hard!

But that’s not the issue some (many) people have with eating. Life ain’t that easy?

☆What to eat?
It’s easy, really. Follow the standard food pyramid.
☆Should you go Vegan?
No.
Why? Because it is our omnivorous diet that allowed for the development of bigger brains in our ancestors. Unless you want a devolution in your descendants down the line, you should continue to eat meat.
Occasionally.
(BTW If you already are vegan, go for it. Own it. But do not make fake meat out of something. The processes involved in this, ruin all ‘value’ contained in your paste, add shit you couldn’t imagine and are surely as healthy as eating a pack of coal. Plus, you look like some cunt unable to follow a simple conviction: no meat or animal products!)
☆Superfoods?
There is no such thing as a superfood. If there were “Superfoods” on this lovely planet we call home, every asshole and their mother would be eating it since forever. No we wouldn’t need to ‘rediscover’ it, it would’ve never been suppressed! Healthy subjects are strong subjects, can fight in your army and pay taxes. It would’ve been in the interests of all churches, all monarchs and dictators, all governments and all peoples of the earth throughout history to consume “Superfoods”. They just don’t exist.
Deal with it.
☆Paleodiet!
No. Just, no. Whole grain is neat and all, but ruins teeth. You don’t want to be hungry and in pain, do you? By the way, unless you can show me wild mammoths to hunt, you ain’t doing paleo anything!
☆Some other diet then?
No. A diet (in the ‘lose weight’ sense) is starving your body of its reserves. Once you end it and go back to ‘normal’ eating habits, your body is in a regenerate-reserves mode, and will pack back on, in case the starving period starts again. That is natural. Change your diet (as in your eating habits), slightly, but permanently. AND EXERCISE!
☆Exercising isn’t bad!!
That is correct. If you do it right. Jogging on concrete sidewalks, for example, IS bad. For your joints and back. If the street next to which you run is a busy one, quit running, start smoking instead. About equally as healthy for you.
☆Moar workout!
Maybe. But as soon as you need to stop your exercising regime (due to sickness or injury for example), you will pack on, unless you restrict your calorie intake as well.

As with so many things, eating right is a question of moderation, not restriction. Consume vitamins in which ever way you prefer (there is no difference between those in pills and those in fruit, grow up), eat moderate amounts, and balance it. Do some exercise.

There. Still wasn’t that hard.
Take care,
A.

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