By now I am certain that most, if not all, of you have heard of pay to win games. You know, games where you have to pay in order to win, or progress faster than the non-paying fair-playing troglodites?

Sure you have.

Now there’s a similar app for the mordern hippies out there, called headspace. The basic version which teaches you how to meditate is free, but additional courses/techniques/etc. will cost you.
Pay-to-ascend, essentially.

Listen here, snowflakes, if you need an app to teach you how to meditate, you’re doing it wrong.

• For starters, there are more ways to meditate listed on the internet for free, than there are ways to blow your money in the app store! 

• Secondly, meditation isn’t something you can strap the prefix ‘speed’ in front of and still run with it. 

Meditation requires a certain calmness, an introspection, shutting out the disturbances – both from within and from outside. 

This isn’t something you can squeeze in, between two meetings and calm yourself, gain focus and ‘mindfulness’ (what ever that gobshite is supposed to mean).
Meditation requires time, quiet and peace.
Not the presence of a disturbing gizmo that is telling you how to do it, like smartphone. 

The principle of this is neat, but once you start to consider it – this isn’t the product of love, this isn’t the tireless labour of a man-turned-one-with-himself. This is a materialistic piece of shit made by greedy fucks. 

If this person (someone whose name sounds like someone tried to come up with a jokename by combining pudding and combe) truly wanted to spread the word to the masses about how to reach enlightenement, how to become more peaceful and create ‘mindfulness’ – he would’ve given it all away for free. Like all the other schmucks on the internet. 

People who use this app are probably the same kind of disturbing cretins who wear sandals with socks, have dreadlocks while being whiter than sourcream, and smoke pot like kids eat candy. Despite the claim that it was created to reach business men. Men who would squeeze this shit in between two meetings to flee the stess, making their schedule busier instead of relaxing a bit. 

BTW: Emma Watson endorsed this shit. You, Ma’am, have lost some of my respect. If you think it is genius to teach people how to meditate – USE GOOGLE! It comes preinstalled on EVERY smartphone, just open the browser type in google[dot]com and go for it. Countless, innumerable sites will teach you. Blogs, sites, groups, videos, made by individuals, collectives, and what not else. 

How did I come to this piece of shite? 

Kindergarten. 

Our kindergarten is fairly moderate with madness, unlike others. There was the waterbottle incident sure, but other than that, peace. 

Until now. 

Not just that we have one of the parents who greets people in e-mails, NOT with “good morning” “G’day mates” or anything like the ordinary. NO. He starts his Mails with “SUN dear parents!”

Also, Christmas collection went around to give gifts to the teachers and assitants. Coupons here, coupons there, amazon, retailers, supermarkets. 

Fine. No problem. 

Until we came upon the decsion to make whether to get amazon coupons, or headspace coupons.

Which made us look into this stuff. 

Guess what the SUN dude would prefer to give away.

Take care,
A.