Posts tagged ‘easter’

Crappy Easter 2017 

Holy snotballs!

If you know a baking aficionado whom you hate, and want them to feel sick to their stomach everytine they bake, here’s the gift idea of your liking.

The pig regurgitates the yolk (out of its nose mind you).

Turn the passion of someone into a phobia. You’re welcome, have a Crappy Easter. (Just the one this year, sorry)

A.

Crappy Easter 4/4

Nothing says resurrection of Christ, quite like a bunny shaped pillow and a stoned plushie.
Nothing.

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Because the death and resurrection of story of this Jesus dude, would be nothing without the integral parts of drug addicted rodents that multiply faster than a virus in an unvaccinated child.
Really.
It’s there, look it up.

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Until next time,
Take care, keep shopping, and good bye.
A.

Crappy Easter 2/4

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Don’t you love itnhow he stands there all like “Bitch always undercooks the eggs.” While she looks as if she laid them herself, colored them to resemble the Irish flag, and seems to ask herself – in a moment of self awareness – why she’s holding this crap, a bunny can’t cook irish sparrow eggs, “you little snottlet”.

So 20 euros for one of the soulsnatching, demon hatching, oirish Bunnies from hell, with an attitude.
Nope. I think not.

Crappy Easter 1/4

It is that yime of the year again, the one where the highest Christian holiday is taking place!

Yes, you read that right. This one is the highest Christian holiday, not that disturbing massdelusion of consumerism in December (for which I still need to make an index).

Anyhow, let us celebrate today’s alleged crucifixion of Jesus Christ, by carrying around colored eggs in this abominable paper trashbag

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In all honesty, the transfixed stare this bag sports, paired with the small, but definitely recognisable smirk is more the stuff of nightmares, than glee and joy. Better keep it away from the kids, unless your little snowflakes from hell are already psychologically disturbed little demon spawns…

Easter presents…

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This easter rabbit can count the eggs hidden behind the house, sitting on the front porch.

Now take this trashbag, and haul this year’s sodded easter crap off…

Fiendish Easter I
Fiendish Easter II
Fiendish Easter III
Fiendish Easter IV
Fiendish Easter V

Yes, yes this was the index for this year’s Easter.
A.

Fiendish Easter V

eggzPlease boil our young, and devour them!
Here, let me help you!

Is this to soothe your conscience? A Hen helping you in the process of devouring an egg?

Really?

pianobunny

“You’re a delusional dipshit if you think I’ll play it again!”

 

 

Fiendish Easter IV

shudderThis cackling and jiggling chick is the latest of motorized easter gimmicks.

Scaring away Spring and Fertility Spirits, small children, and even Jesus, this demon – placed behind the door after the scare tactics of a dismebodied rabbit head had failed – will succeed in preparing for the arrival of the antichrist….