Posts tagged ‘garlic’

Life IS that hard, cooking

Making Spaghetti. Starting with the sauce, onions are chopped to tiny bits, and put into the pot with the hot oil.
Letting them roast for juuust a tiny bit, then adding the minced meat.
Smell is already mouthwatering!

Wife yells from the adjacent living room: “Don’t forget the garlic!”
We have garlic. Lots of it. Peeled and put in the deep freezer. I turn off the stove, put the pot aside and get two cloves out, look for the garlic press – the one you put the cloves in, press minced garlic out by sheer muscle strength – and start pressing them into the minced meat and onions mass.
CLANG! The mesh on the other side of the press explodes into four pieces of shrapnel, three of which disappeared in the mass of the pot, the last hanging on to dear life on the press….

No spaghetti sauce, no spaghetti.
Take out it is then.

Have a nice weekend.

T minus 1

KILL IT WITH FIRE!Well, kids, this is it.
The crown juwel of this christmas calendar.

The Edward Cullen action figure!

Every little girl who thinks that Bella is a lucky girl, wants this. Luckily for them once they grow older, Edward can be “used” as a dildo replacement. (Yes, I said that!)

Alternative uses include, but aren’t limited to:
Demon Bane (instead of a crucifix)
or to stab REAL vampires in the heart – it is super effective, like a combination of a wooden stake, garlic and sunlight (because REAL vampires don’t sparkle, they die in the sun).
Also works great on werwolves, better than a large clip of silver bullets for a semi-automatic – just stab the Frakker in the face (or heart).

Placed on the window sill Edward Cullen will keep away werwolves, vampires, banshee’s, ghouls, nightmares and ghosts. And act like all of them combined on your soul.
If you have anyone in your circle of enemies (or relatives, it’s the same thing basically) whom you want to have as arch-nemesis for eternity – here’s the perfect gift. In addition, give them a garden gnome for their birthday…

Hail the Cook?

Never, ever, try on a Monday to find a restaurant in Groß Enzersdorf that is open.

Two were closed all together, one had closed a quarter an hour before we arrived, and the last one was an Italian “ristorante”…well, the table was sticky, the waitress was unfriendly, and the non-smokers section was so badly lit I suspect they didn’t want anyone sitting there. First thing they told us when we arrived “You can’t have anything but Pizza.” – we should have let that be a warning and leave.

Right there, right then.

Suffice it to say, we didn’t. Stupid us.

Let me put it that way: This Pizza gives me so much gas, the USA are investigating me for weapons of mass destruction!

It tasted like, well, nothing.
A simple Salami Pizza with extra garlic.
How difficult is it to get this thing to taste like SOMETHING!?

Apparently very: a hint of garlic where the patches of garlic where piled together, and between me and my wife, I was the lucky one: I had a small path of oregano strewn around in the centre of my pizza.
Except it didn’t taste as intense as I had hoped.
Or as intense as it should.

So if you’re ever in Austria, in Vienna, on a Monday and you think to yourself “I want to eat in that village just north of it, Groß Enzersdorf!” Don’t….