Posts tagged ‘hippie’

BTH – ASMR…

Why is this even a thing?

These are people who do not know how to use a microphone: they’re breathing into one as if they wanted to either swallow, or make sweet sweet love to it.
That is NOT how you use a mic, dumbass.

I’m not one to deny others their kink, far from it, but you wankers want the “girlfriend experience” – without the “experience” part.
You see, afaik, some prostitutes offer “the girlfriend experience” (for extra of course), and then you get cuddling, kissing, sweet talk, and what not (I imagine). There you get an actual experience.
With this crap you get no experience.

If I were one to go on business trips around the globe, so when I lay my weary CEO head down to cry on a cushion stuffed with stacks of cash while I pleasure myself to sleep, my beloved trophy wife is not able to lull me through it on the phone thanks to timezones, I’d have her breathe into a mic for half an hour, nude, and then play that video back to me.
I am not.
These people are not near and dear to me.
On the polar opposite.
They are complete and utter fraking strangers!
Making all of this a little creepy…

I would almost understand this, if it were porn [porn-porn. Not this brain-porn crap that someone equated this bullshit to]:
A naked chick (or guy, what have you), giving an imaginary protagonist (the camera) a POV girlfriend experience.
With sweet talk, breathing into a microphone, sensual descriptive talk about what they ‘are doing’ with you, complete with ‘noise’.

But this is people breathe-talking in the most annoying fashion possible [not whispered, not spoken, but the dimwitted bastard offspring of the two, that’s too loud and pronounced to be soothing or comfortable, but too low and hushed to be easily intelligible], making noise too close to the microphone [if I for example were to crave the sound of a girl brushing her long long hair, I want to hear it like normal people hear it, not the way a mic taped to the back of the brush picks it up!], and saying the most ridiculously mundane crap ever [if you have no one in your life you can talk about bowel movements with, stop the ASMR, quit your busy job and get friends and/or a spouse, because that is what you NEED]!

Get outta here!

But note, after this election I understand everyone who needs to get relaxed in any way shape or form.

Life ain’t that hard, gardening

Having a garden, or sufficiently large balcony to pot some plants, might get you to try your hand at gardening.
But if you listen to the people who do it, it sounds like fraking rocket science. Especially the hippy type characters who run a gardening blog or shit like that.

Life ain’t that hard, it’s simple. Really it is, plants have been on land longer than any animal has, so that shit knows how to propagate, right?

Step 1 – take your seed or seedling that you obtained from a trusted source of your discretion, put it in soil. Boom. Finished.
Step 2 – care for it like you would a pet. Give it some daylight (you’ll either figure it out how much, or have just one option on your balcony), plenty of water (don’t drown it, don’t dry it up) and
Step 3 – feed it. Yes, feed it. Fertiliser! Either purchase some of your choosing, or make your own (kitchen scraps, anything that decomposes but if you are smell aware, don’t use meat, diary products or the like. Plants are essentially cannibals.)
Step 4 – Plants. Reap your harvest, or enjoy your pretty flowers, what have you.
Step 5 – Rinse and Repeat. Unless you have perennials.

There, saved you a ton of browsing through the internet and getting confused by the Hippies. If anyone tries to shove shit down your pipe about gardening, referr them to this list.
Consise, and true.

PS:
Step 6 (throw it in there somewhere) – Pest control. Unless you are running a farm, trie and use natural pest control. ladybugs eat mites. Salt kills and deterrs snails. And so on. Don’t whip out the “nukes” unless you make a living off of your gardening.

Have fun,
A.

Life ain’t that hard presents Beating the Hippies

No, today there will be no lesson in how to live life a bit more easy than what you’re used to.

Today LATH proudly presents BTH

Why?
It needs to be done, that’s why. I am sick and tired of the hippie shit I have to put with, so I am taking that peace sign from you and I will peacefully, and lovingly, bludgeon you to death with it.

There will be a whole range of topics and the BTH posts will be as rando, as the LATH posts, I have laid some topics out before me, but one thing needs to come first, and what’s the first thing that comes to mind when freely associating Hippie?

Weed.

I have had it with you folks telling the world that weed solves every ailment, ever.
Weed and coconut oil.

Listen you wind-tunnels, the moment you set something ablaze – be that tobacco, weed, crack, neighbors – so you can smoke it, guess what. You are inhaling smoke, which is not much more than gas, ash and soot. Which all is carcinogenic.
Your stupid claim that weed smoking (if only pure weed blunts are used) is null and void if you apply logic.

Don’t get me wrong people, I enjoyed that stuff when I was younger. I’d enjoy it today if I could get my hands on some, but the arguments are utter crap.

Legalise it? Yes. Give it to Hippies? No.

Punch it,
A.

Life ain’t that hard: School

It really is easy.

Get sent to school.
Survive.
Study and Graduate.
Have kids.
Send them to school.

You see here is the issue some of the parents out there are missing. They’re breaking the cycle.
They are homeschooling.
WHICH IS ONE OF THE DUMBEST THINGS I HAVE EVER HEARD OF!!

Mostly it’s these Antivaxxer Broccoli Milkshake hippie idiot parents who home school.
Listen you brain numb buffoons, would you take your car to have the brakes fixed to a guy who “really learned everything” from his dad, who has never know much about cars other than the fact that they have engines (or worse, draws a shamanic symbol on the wheels designed to invoke brake-spirits) or to someone who has a certificate and proper licence and education?

You would never take up advice from a stay home mum, who had only a basic education and training, on the intricate workings of your home’s plumbing, now would you?

Main motivation behind this homeschooling BS is the bullying that kids are exposed to at schools. There is a better solution than homeschooling. There is a better solution than teaching kids to stand up against bullies.
TEACH KIDS NOT TO BULLY!
There was a picture of a bully online recently, who had been caught bullying by hia dad. He then internet shamed his bullying son, and forced him to do social work. That’s the way! There you go.

Another big reason is “conformity”. These hippie dipahits fearing that their kids will be turned into braindead dummies for the system – forgetting that this exact system had shat them out too.
Conformity is an integral part of the human existence and experience. We are herd animals and want to be with the others, like the others. Besides, conformity in education guarantees identical chances later in life.

All this nonconformity garbage is only producing hippie-conform children. A truly nonconform child would be the unpredictable hellspawn we want to avoid our children becoming.

So again, let’s expand this:

Get sent to school.
Survive.
Study and Graduate.
Have kids.
Send them to school.
Teach them not to bully.
Let them be conform.

Have grandkids, enjoy.

21. Dec. 2014

21The Akasha Pillar.

So if you are lucky enought to have 4,499,00 Euro to spare, consider the following.

In your circle of friends, or relatives – no matter how distant – is there someone who believes in absolute bullshit? I mean like Orgone energy (that life giving and binding force that makes it’s believers look like people who think Star Wars is a documentary) and Chemtrails (Contrails that are so poisonous, laced with chemicals and pure death), Morgellons (fungi that grow out of your skin, adapt foreign DNA to form human- and rat-fetuses in your entrails, designed by the NWO distributed through CHemtrails), who believe that Aluminum is a heavy metal (uuuh….nope. Not gonna go there), who hide their kids when they only hear the word “vaccine” (*sigh*).

Do you?

Good! Then give them this monstrosity. This has as a catalyst a (I’m quoting!) “seven layered cheopspyramid” – Uuuuh…there is only ONE Cheops-Pyramid. It’s in Egypt. All other pyramids are pyramids, but not Cheops Pryamids. Period. And a “Corpus made from artifical resin finished with holy symbols and energised jewels” – what symbols? Crosses, Davidstars, Pentagrams, Sickelmoons, Mickey Mouse? Tell me! Or SHOW me in your promotional video! But nope. Corpus and Pyramid are connected through some copper pipes…

It is supposed to clear out the atmosphere and make Chemtrails (don’t exist) disappear.

So if you have a bafoon in your circle of friends/relatives, and too much money for your own good? Perfect!

Addendum to the Hippies…

A well known theatre (actors on a stage) in my country is in dire need of renovations. To rake in donations they started an advertising campaign (with a rather unsettling image):

The woman in the picture (in others it’s a man) has no eyes, but skin stretched over the place where eyes should be. The slogan goes something like this: “Whether you want to see it, or not. No renovation. No theater. Let’s do something.”
Okay. Sad, but okay.

So far, so good.

Then someone took a sharpie (or edding) and wrote on the forehead of the woman on the ad the following

“So much injustice…
so many wars…so much lunacy…
whom is caring for theatre then?”

I know it isn’t supposed to say “whom” but I wanted to carry the grammatical error over from german, and this is the best I could come up with. So that would be issue number one with that graffity.

Number 2: Injustice? Wars? Lunacy? That’s business as usual you numbskull!
We need theatre (and it’s successors “Movies”, “TV”, “Gaming”, “Internet”) as a form of escapism. I’d rather live in a world with injustice, wars and lunacy that has these escapsims in it, than a world with absolute peace, equality and sense that has NO (performing) arts!

Theatre (and it’s successors) not only provide relief from the world we have to endure, but also serve as a projection of our dreams. Even IF we were to have peace, equality and sanity in the world, all of the world, we still have dreams, dreams that can’t be fulfilled.
For example: No magic, no starships (yet), so we need a projector.

We need and want drama, we need it to satisfy our basic emotional responses. We want it in order to feel empathy.
To remind us why we are doing what we are doing. In that perfect world this hippy scribbler indirectly demands, we will soon suffer from a lack of empathy, as there is no suffering, thus we become indifferent.
That’s were drama comes in.
In the world we live in right now, we need drama to remind us that there are solutions to things. To hone our empathy, and transport that empathy from the play (etc.) out into the real world.

Theatre (and so on) satisfies our need for human interaction, even if we are a social introvert, we are still hardwired to NEED it, and this is a basic need served. An introvert who can’t speak to people, still can feel (empathy wise) the entire emotionrange due to these projections.

So you god damn hippy, we need theatre (and so on), as escapism, as honing for our empathy, as distraction, as levitation, as projection. We need to dream, to hope, to aim, to reflect, to think, but also to shut down our mind and let things unfold without us interfering.
For thousands of years there was theatre as entertainment in one way or another.
Denying that it is a basic human need to entertain and be entertained, is even more crippling to society and our development,than injustice, wars and lunacy together.

With that said, here the stumbling block:

CreepyTake care, peace
A.

PS: Yes, she looks like something lifted from a creepypasta…

T minus 4

Peace of bread?Organic peacebread.

Created in honor of the 2008 international peace conference at Rosecastle.

Really? I recon that if you create such a piece of peace you give it to the participants of the conference. You sell it there and THEN. But now five years on, this is ridiculous.

Besides, do they really think this “peace” of bread will change anything? If it did, it would be illegal.
Especially if it had any weed in it, like I would make a “Peace Bread”. 😉

Give this to the aging hippie in your family, you all have at least ONE in your family…

(The only instance in which you are grammatically ALLOWED to confuse “peace” and “piece”)