Posts tagged ‘married’

Random Rant 11.Dec 2014

In advance dear readers, I have to apologise for any harsh language in this post. I’m angry.
Sorry.

Well, I got a call from my wife.

We seem to have forgotten to pay the Dog-Tax on time, and they had sent us one of their minions to collect the tax.

Listen here you numbskulls, you send a letter with an invoice, we forget to pay.
Okay.
That’s bad behaviour on our part, but after that, you send another letter. That’s how everything in this world runs.
It’s called “a reminder”. Usually added with a late fee. Begrudingly I’d even pay that, since we are at fault here.

But you don’t show up with one your cretins on our doorstep! And let us fill out a form whether the dog owner (my wife) is married (a simple check in your database could solve that question without annoying us/her), whether we have a car (again, look up the databases at your disposal. Is there a car registered under the name? Yes? Woooow!!!! Shall I make a LATH post for you?) who pays the rent (why on earth would that concern you? It ain’t your business who is paying the rent!!!) and so on.
Just be glad I wasn’t home during the time of this questioning. I would’Ve given you these exact answers.
“Are you married?” – None of your business. Look it up.
“Do you have a car?” – None of your business. Look it up.
“Who is paying the rent?” – Absolutetly none of your business. Draw a Venn Diagramm of people likely to pay the rent and play the odds.

I despise the ground these tax/fee collecting misfits cast their shadows upon, and I hope a meteor incinerates the ground they walk on.

The real issue I have with the Dog-Tax is not that we have to pay it, but that they demand 82(!!!!) Euro, and STILL they force you to pick up dog poop.
NO!
With that amount of money I’m throwing into the dumpster here I demand you bowlmovements pick up the dog poop yourself. Remember some many decades ago? You justified the taxation of dogs with “we have to pay people who pick up the dog poop”. Good, now pick it up.

82 Euro a year, I expect people in fine suits come and pick it up, not the usual grimey workers, no, suit and tie wearing thieves who otherwise would only gather dust behind a desk and waste organs and oxygen.
Go and pick up dog poop you anal-orifices!

Again, I must ask for your forgiveness dear readers.
I just had to vent this…

A.

Wedding bells…

…well dear audience, I’m writing this in advance, because today is my wedding day!

Today the most wonderful,  beautiful and intelligent woman I can ever hope to meet, will wed way below her level, and become my wife.

So, today there will be no hatred and poison dripping post, no rant about stuff that only kindergarteners and old farts find worth ranting about, no pun ridden blurp that is making you question both my sanity and my IQ.

No.

Today is my wedding day, and today all you got was this post, not even a T-Shirt. 😉 Today there should be ripples of love vibrating through the air, not emissions of anger.

So today, on my wedding day, let me say: Thank you!
Thanks for reading my rants, comedic blurps, and especially thank you for reading my stories.

Hope you have had a nice 4th April 2014!

Take care,
A.