Posts tagged ‘social media’

The Digitally Dilapidated

During our stay in a four star hotel at the beautiful istrian beach, with warm, clear waters and a great view on Rovinj, I noticed something.
Parents, kids of all ages, entire families, couples, all just watching/reading shit of their phones, tablets, and in one case, a laptop even.

At breakfast, lunch, dinner, beach, pool, wherever.
“What did you see during your vacation in Coratia?”
“YouTube, Facebook and Instagram”
Fuck you.

Here, my conviction, that smartphones aren’t made for us, got it’s final veneer. Perhaps some future generation that is truly capable of multitasking might take advantage of this stuff, but it is not for us.

Instead of spending time with their families, their spouses, their parents, their siblings, their children, or just plain taking in the vistas, nature, clean air and relative silence, people are staring at their phones! Instead of getting away from the shit that they are confronted with daily at home, they take it with them EVERYWHERE, and then wonder, why they do not feel relaxed.
I had people at the hike through the Plitvica Lakes Nationalpark, looking at their phones, occasionally looking up, going “wow” snapping a crappy cellphone picture and then continue typing/reading shit.

For Fucks Sake! LIVE IN THE REAL WORLD! Not the virtual world. Converse with one another, and get more substance out of fewer connections, instead of more connections with less substance.
Moronic cancers of human (de)evolution.
Take care, and put away those fucking devices, make a scheduled “social media (half)hour” once a day, and other than that, no social media, no texts/messages. Same with news. Just calls.
A.

Social media ain’t for us

Social networks have turned people into shittier friends.

That’s my conclusion after going off of Facebook and not doing much on Mastodon for a few days.

We have our connections, and acting on the “assumption” that our audience is there, we send something out into the aether and giddily await reactions.

We do not actively seek out our friends: “Hey, how are you? Got time for a coffee to talk about stuff?”
No, we act as if we are on a stage, we await reactions, and we react.
We perform.
We perform the initial action, and we perform the reactions.
It’s the same across all platforms, not just Facebook, but also Mastodon, and of course Instagram, Twitter, MeWe, Tsu and all the other garbage heaps too.

Social networks make us (more) asocial.
Social networks aren’t for us (people).

We are social animals.
We, once, needed the group, the tribe, to survive:
Loners died. Groups thrived.

It is engrained in our genes, that we need a group. Our friends, our family, our tribe, our people.
But because today (read: current times) it is harder to maintain friendships (full time employment, separated by many kilometres, different life choices [f.e. kids vs. no kids], ever shifting and expanding ‘tribal’ landscapes, etc.) we *could* use social media as a crutch, as an add on.

But this add-on has become full on bloat-ware that is now taking over the entire system.

People have shifted their entire lives into social media, they are always on, always available (except when asleep).
Which I find highly disturbing.
Which, incidentally, is only adding to my decision to kill all my Facebook and Google related stuff, and limit my Mastodon time.

If I want to scream into the void and wait for any reactions, I’m doing it on my blog. (Or I’d go to a comedy club on stage.)

But I’m done with social media. It is asocial. It has taught me that.
I noticed that I have become a shittier friend, and I’ve seen this happen to other people as well: Be seen. Be seen seeing.
But I don’t want to be an actor on a stage receiving attention at the speed and value of a Like/Fav/RT/mention/etc.
I want REAL connections; conversations – even digital – but not over an eavesdropping service that finds ways to insert itself and sabotage the entire thing.

No thanks.

Whatever you do out there, take care,
A.

Life ain’t that hard, Social Media

If you’re a lowlife cretin who should be bludgeoned to death with a balloon animal for the following, or parts of it:

-Posting quarter hourly updates on yourself, or
-Reposting loud images (with often incorrect shite in them) from all over the place,
-Interspersed with invites to some shitty games that no one cares for and everyone wants to cut your hands off for playing
-Liking a crapzillion of pages, and thus spreading their filth
-Logging in at every corner you visit

then fret not, for it is simple, thou shalt follow these basic decency & behavior commandments for social media:

1. Logeth in and checketh out.
This means, read other people’s posts first, before boldy blaring out your status, which no one really cares for. 

2. Thou may engage in reactions.
If you want to, you can react to someone else’s post(s). That is the social part of social media. You are not the star, just another schmuck, those are not your fans, but, supposedly, your friends. Interact, mingle, comment.

3. Thou mayeth post.
Post one, maybe two, status updates per day. TOPS! Only in emergency situations (f.e. toppling an oppressive government) is it okay to forgo this limit.

4. Thou shalt not RePost!
Just, don’t. Unless it is really important (really occuring revolutions, missing people, rabid bears or pedophiles, etc.)

5. Enough pictures.
Enough babies, enough cats, enough boobs and asses. Go to a special interest group/site if you want to see or share this, but the general public doesn’t care for any of that.

6. Moar of ye olde Pictures!
If you’re too young to remember boring slideshows of other people’s holidays, ask your parents, or grandparents how frigging boring that was. Want to share your holiday experience? One to Five pictures which highlight the best of it, will do, if someone is genuinely interested in more, they’ll ask. (Ahahahaha!!!)

7. Enough with the liketh!
Not everything you encounter in life needs a like online!
Bands, artists, celebrities, etc. Yes.
Brands, products, politicians, websites, etc. No!

8. Playeth with thineself.
No one cares for your geese or your jewels or your candy – if anything we’d like to see you buried under a mountain of that stuff. Keep it to yourself!

9. Logeth out.
Yes, the dreaded end of one’s participation in social idiocy.
Listen, don’t stay online for hours and hours more, having the media site track your every movement out there. Don’t be the intelectually malnutritioned fool, that is taking all their knowledge from the lopsided soup that is your prefered newsfeed. Controversy, disagreeing opinions those are NURTURING the mind, sharpening it. LOG OUT!

And the grand finale!
10. Thou shalt not reveal thine location!
Stop giving away your location! Just, no! We don’t care where you are, nor should you care where the others are. If they’re near you, but won’t see you, guess what? They don’t like you! Stop checking in from the pub at the corner of my block. Get lost creep.

It is a little extensive, so here’s the print out version:

1. Logeth in and checketh out.
2. Thou may engage in reactions.
3. Thou mayeth postonce or twice daily.
4. Thous shalt not RePost!
5. Enough pictures
6. Moar of ye olde Pictures!
7. Enough with the liketh!
8. Playeth with thineself.
9. Logeth out.
10. Thou shalt not reveal thine location!

Glue it next to your screen, make it your phone’s lock screen – what ever it takes for you to stop this crap!

Get your silly acts together, stop making social media asocial places, that are more a sewer than a place of interaction.

As always, take care,
A.

People are fucking nuts.

Just a fun FYI, for once I would like to witness today’s title happening literally. 😉

What drove me to my “highly unusual” conclusion of mass debility?

Amazon, Books and People.

This mixture is odd, you say?
Maybe.
But once you saw that in the top selling books, two coloring books are among the top ranked, you start asking questions.
Like: Are there really that many children around, that these not only are top sellers, but also out of stock, on Amazon? – in short: No.
These books are bought FOR adults.
Colored in BY adults.

That was the moment I took some toilet paper, and wiped off my faith in humanity:

Coloring books for adults.

Are you fraking kidding me? I repeat: Coloring Books. For Adults!

Any potential “calming down” effects aside – you can get that from watching a fire consume the bodies of your enemies – how much more infantile can you get?
Coloring out a fairytale landscape is for five year olds, but not for grown ass people. 

Those are the same kind of people who think the Bible is to be taken literally, who believe Vaccines cause autism, who take channelings from the galactic federation of light seriously, and who take globuli against diabetus!

Coloring frak books, for fracking adults!
And you wonder why extremists want to wipe out western civilisation? There’s the answer. Grownups doing coloring books, and posting it online, while western society is standing by and let’s it happen without a word against it.

If it was one or two mental patients, my mouth would be shut tight. But two entire mental institutions couldn’t buy out the entire amazon.com stock! All of the US, can.
And here I sense the real tragedy – people with access to nuclear weapons (which are controlled by computers using 5inch floppy discs) are doing coloring-books.
Really?
A nation that sent men to the moon fourty-six years ago, is now populated by people who do this stuff for a pass time?
Really?
All you coloring Schmucks, turn to your (great)grandfathers. Look at them. They fought, in a little event called the second world war, Korean war, Vietnam war, and many more. They fought, for you. For your future.
And this is how you repay them? By doing coloring books?
If this was a fad amongst Veterans, who compensate for their PTSD – again, tightly shut pie holeon my part. But this is done by people with no excuse. The Teletubby generation, I presume.

Look numbnuts, if you need to unwind after a long day at work, do what I do – read. Books with words. Let your mind soar, sharpen it, and enjoy what unfolds. One book, one chapter, can give you more images in your head, than an entire library of coloring-books ever could!
But if you have to color in a coloring-book, here’s my suggestion. Do it in secret. Only oncea month, or in (or rather AFTER) very stressful situations – go home. Close all blinds, unhook the phone, turn off TV and internet, drink some wine (Ravenwood’s Zinfandel is recommended), and sit down with your array of 42 color pencils and a fresh page of the coloring book. Then toss that thing in the trash! And draw something that comes to your mind. Something that is truly allowing you to let out some steam! If it is a fiery mess that is eating through your life – doesn’t matter, as long as it let’s out some steam. If it looks like a 3 year old drew it, and your thirty three, doesn’t matter!

But don’t do coloring books, for crying out loud.

Take care, and lay off those coloring books!
A.

Shamelessness

Or: Why I suck at marketing

This is about my apparent inability to generate more views or followers for my blog. (Christmas Calendar not withstanding, that time was great, thank you people. Be prepared for X-Mess 2015!)

Let me get one thing out of the way before you shake your head in disgust and surf on: I’m not measuring my success with Likes or Followers.
They give me validation, yes.
But I get much more validation through views.

Why?

I read and watch a lot of stuff on the net, without handing out ‘likes’, yet I’ve read or watched it.
I even come back to read/watch more, culminating in me ‘following’.
This can go on for ages without me handing out a single ‘like’.
Views therefore mean much more to me than the occasional ‘likes’. (“You’ve seen it, you can’t unsee it!”)

This bit is about my apparent inability for shameless self-promotion.
In many groups I have joined online, no matter where (facebook, google+, MeWe, etc.) an Author hirself will show up and be like:

No_one-EvarHeardOf posted: From the acclaimed writer of the brilliant Theobald Quincy Cockburn-Hutzenbrutzen novels, the incandescentMy-Intestines-burn trilogy, comes the new bold part 1 of 5000, in the excitingly fiery series 51 shades of beige!

And I just can’t do that.
No one knows my name, no one gives a frak. So why would, or should, I pretend to be an ‘acclaimed writer’? (Or something similar)
Close to no one (except you brave souls who dare venturing to my blog when a new story part comes out) ever heard of my writings. So citing them as a reference – moot.

I just can’t lie boldly in the face of a potential audience, to garner their interest. If I were to get paid for this, I’d feel like I swindled someone out of their savings! Unlike money, the time, I would steal from my (potential) audience, can not be returned. So I have even greater reservations, from just going online and boldly claim shit, that I think is only true inside my head!

Pride in one’s accomplishments is completely justified, but if you’re a relatively unknown individual – do not assume a title like ‘acclaimed writer’, nor praise your own work as the greatest thing since the pyramids.
That makes you look like a complete Schmuck!

(And that, by the way, is why the Schmucks always get great view counts, good sales and great advertising cash, while most honest writers dwell in dirt, and their schmucky heirs later bathe in cash…or honest Schmoe turns into douchy Schmuck)

Yes, dear readers.
This is the reason why, if you came here following one of my ever repetitive social network posts, or discovered one of them, that post sounded sorta lame, and why there only will be equally lame posts.
I will not dash out there posting “From the fresh new writer yourstruly, comes the deeply philosophical, beloved story: Mr. Zed!”

“From the acclaimed writer of the philosophical Zombie Masterpiece Mr. Zed, here’s the highly brain tingling ‘Whose World’ series!”

Take care, and avoid the flyin bovine waste,
A.

PS: I think what bothers me almost as much as the airborne bovine waste distribution methods (aka Bullshit flyong around), is these people are talking in third person of themselves. Only royals (do I need to go there?) and crazy people do that. I ain’t crazy enough for that. (Yet!)

But I’m not a reposter…

So this is the deal folks, there is this new social networking site.
I love it.
It is invite based (at the moment at least), here is my link for you guys to join: www.tsu.co/augur

But! Before you get your panties all brown and yellow over this entire “they pay you” deal, here’s the problem I’m having.
I do not get any revenue.
I post. I post a lot. Nothing.
I get views. I get replies and likes. Nothing.
Yes, I set up the Bank. Still, nothing.
And I am afraid I have found the difficulty in this site.

They do not pay you for your content. They pay for reposts.
All the folks there repost shit from their “timeline” and all these folks get some revenue. I hate reposting, thus don’t do it.
No revenue.

I’m still hapoy to be there, ain’t in it for some insignificant amounts of cash. But if this is devolving into a ‘repost for monetary rewards’ network, I’m leaving. I hate all this ‘shared’ nonsense on facebook, retweets and reposts. Absolutely detest it.
If tsÅ« is just there for the reposts and no originality – screw it.

Hope you guys still give it a try, perhaps it is just a glitch, or they will pay for original content in the future.

Take care and hope to see you there.
A.

Look up…or not.

When ever new technology or a new idea was introduced into a society, it caused turmoil.

It caused “old school” folks to prophesy doom. Always!
Look it up. Broad writing and reading skills introduced? “Young people can’t memorize things anymore. Society will be ruined.”
New vehicles going faster than 30 km/h? “A human body can’t take that velocity (for long). We’re doomed!”
TV? “It kills imagination. Kids don’t go outside anymore.”

And while it is true that video killed the radiostar (Artist over Art), the majority of these fears were unjustified and unwarranted.

So why on earth do social media and smartphones/Tablets(/GoogleGlass?) ruin our society?
Easy. They don’t.

Yes, Facebook, google+ and other social networks aren’t the same as talking with your friends, acquaintances and relatives in real life. But you ARE interacting with another human being (somewhere)!
You might not know any of your bazillion friends personally, but you do know them sort of. You are interacting with (some of) them on a daily basis.
From some 50 years ago up until recently (and still) people sat in busses and trams and subways with newspapers, or books, not interacting with anyone.
Just reading.

I’m a book buff myself, but if you break it down, sitting in the subway and reading a book is more antisocial than sitting there Fecesbooking someone!
Before you are an antisocial asshole not noticing people around you or anywhere else other than inside your head, keep your head down on that little screen.

Young people have social interactions with peers.
Period.
You don’t have to mingle with some one you might know well, but don’t like their hobbies and views on things, just because they are your age group and in your class. You communicate with people you get along with well. And if they are half a globe away – so what?

The entire “You are antisocial” campaign is a money thing people. Shelf that shit right away as a passing trend. New technology, new trends, new ideas have always brought forth the ones who felt uncomfortable with it, or just couldn’t get it.

Some day down the road I too will say that this new shit will ruin our society, because, let’s face it people, I’m not getting any younger, and my comfort zone will be broken. When you get a digital lens that connects with the internet and allows you to be online 24/7 even in your sleep, I will opt-out. But my son, or my grandchildren, probably won’t.
Remember what our parents said about the new things we had as kids and teens? Right. Now think about your stance on the current technology.

Don’t let the fad of some people who want to seem edgy, cool and rebellious, while at the same time being conservative -ish fool you. Although you might have 4.000.621 friends on facebook, and not know a single one of them personally, you have contacts. You are NOT alone.
And if you feel down and blue, and in desperate need of personal interaction, there are people around you. Go to a pub, a sports event, there are colleagues and relatives.
It ain’t that hard, but don’t jump the train of stupid.

Take care, and talk to each other at least once in a while.
A.