Posts tagged ‘turd’

12. Dec. 2014

12If you have one of these overly philosophical people in your life that quote shit from facebook and think that the romance in Episode II was deep, who have a wall tattoo in their bedroom “Don’t dream your life, live your dreams!” then this is the perfect gift for them.

YOU’RE SO DEEP I CAN’T EVEN SEE YOU ANYMORE!

A pottery dog-end for your garden, not even anatomically correct (anus). For the really deep thoughts of the Yule season “Why do we drag a fresh corpse into the house and further humiliate the tree by decorating it” is only the first question asked by this deep thinking, deep philosophical turd digger…

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Insanity Break! Storytime…

I was entering the village stroke after midnight, expecting little to no activity on the streets and squares. But there was a huge bulk of people gathered around the local temple, and an old man in grey robes ran around the temple with his hair on fire. As I approached he doused the flames and approached me: “It has been stolen! Quick hero, thou must use thy skills and courage wisely, to reobtain our most sacred relict! The golden turd of wisom, otherwise known as bullshit!” he presented a repulsive tablecloth of once green color, it reeked of urin and stale wine. “This shall be your reward if you succeed!” after I inquired what it was he looked a little offended but continued: “The wise man’s cape of ignorance! Reduces your worries and helps you sleep sound.”
As I was in desperate need of some good night sleep I agreed to help…